My Growth Transformation

I shall never stop growing... We shall never stop growing. It all boils down to how open and willing we are to continue growing, regardless of the circumstances and life's chaotic turn of events.

Life is beyond perfect, but that's just the fun of it; figuring out solutions that work best for us, deciphering all sorts of life equations to ultimately reach our ideal outcome, putting on the "overthinker" mask on and off, caring more than necessary about other people's opinions, devoting too much of our time and energy to people who do not pay us back with the same amount, and to things which do not really benefit us in the long run.

These will consequently lead to, without a shred of doubt, an apparently endless list of reasons as to why life is complicated and not moving forward in our favor. Life will unarguably be perceived as complicated as long as you choose to look at it this way. So, try to assign a more positive connotation to life, wherein your attitude, actions, behavior speak the same language as your thoughts.

Our energy reservoir is in our full control; we get to decide when and how to use this energy, depending on how much we love life, respectively how intensely and passionately we want to live our lives. Letting ourselves open up to the hidden mysteries of life or withdrawing into our shell, thus not granting access to our flowing energy anymore? We control this energy inside of us, hence we direct where our energy should go and be invested in.

I've always seemed to prefer allowing this energy to flow inside of me, as opposed to living my life with a closed-minded attitude, thus blocking the energy to keep me mentally alive. I've gone through and dealt with a roller coaster period several times, when I was unwittingly putting other people's happiness on the first place, being too emotionally attached to everyone's opinions about me, having limited freedom to voice out my own thoughts for I was slightly afraid not to upset the others and so forth; simply said, I was not the person I wanted to be, though I knew the person I wanted to be and deserved to be.

I was the sum of other people's opinions and thoughts at my expense, thus lacking a voice, a personality.

How could I gain back the confidence of having a personality of my very own?

I started being more selective and I tried to stop caring less and less! That doesn't mean I turned into a cruel, selfish person; no, that's not the point... the point is that I decided to love myself more, because I am the only person capable of truly doing that to live my best life! If I want peace of mind, then I need to stop caring about what other people think of me, cause this kind of people will be talking anyway, whatever you do and end up doing...if they think that by doing this, they live a fulfilling and happy life, I let them be, cause it is their choice to live such a life. But then it's also my choice to block external influences and triggers that affect my well-being, because I know I want to live a happy life...because I love myself more than that, more than allowing others to define my worth, in their futile attempt to steal it away from me.

Yes, I have learned, owing to past experiences of this kind, to listen to myself more and to value myself more, because at the end of the day, nobody else will. Choosing to grow is terrifying, because you constantly need to adapt and to change based on your surroundings, the people, the atmosphere etc.; but at no time should you change the core, the essence of what truly defines you!